we found one!!!

PRAISE GOD For all He provides!!! We found and have had our bid accepted on a house!! It was the most complete house for what we wanted in a great neighborhood. I really wanted a house that had all the bedrooms downstairs as I'm sorta tired of hauling baskets of laundry up--these granny legs aren't what they use to be--lol!! John got the three car garage he wanted too!

The best thing of all is that we should be closing on our wedding anniversary! Now that is the best anniversary gift ever!

House shopping!!!!!!

I am over the moon with excitement about going house hunting!! I never thought we would be at this point again with all that has taken place. I could not have known we would be going through all we did well over a year ago when we finally just picked up and moved form the Wagoner house but GOD HAS BEEN FAITHFUL THROUGH IT ALL EVEN THOUGH I HAVE HAD WEAK MOMENTS!

The funny thing about things having taken as long as they have is that John and I both have a greater understanding of what exactly we do want--things that seemed so important 1 and 2 years ago no longer matter. Our family size has shrunk so we don't need as much space as we thought and living with some features that we thought we would just love has turned out for me to be things I really could live without ( like hauling laundry up and down stairs--ugh!!).

God has been so faithful to listen to me whine and complain about this and that and of course He has also had some times in which HE needed to remind me that my place in life is to grow where I'm planted which was not what I really wanted to do a lot of the time. Through all of this I have mastered the art of appreciation in ways I never had before and so I would gladly go through all of the past again just to have that valuable lesson learned.

We have a short list of about 7 houses to go see --so far none stood out as something we were head over heals about but I think that is because we have come to value the love that goes into making a house a home and not just the outside structure. I really believe with all my heart I can be happy with whatever house we do end of buying ( even if I have to spend the next 16 years hauling laundry upstairs-lol!!).I'm ready to bloom where God wants us planted and enjoy the growing season.

They want the HOUSE!!!!

Praise GOD the very thing that I prayed for is coming to pass!!! We have new people who WANT THE WAGONER HOUSE!!!! In fact they wanted it so much they kept calling and calling trying to get us to just lease it out but when we said we wanted to sell it out right they went and found a way to buy it!!!! We did let them 'rent it' while the paperwork goes through and all but fully expect to have it in their name ASAP!!!

I prayed God would send a woman who would love that house and want it so much she was giddy with joy and that is exactly what she is. The husband and wife are beside themself that they have this house and it is EXACTLY what they were praying for!!!!


So glad and thankful that my GOD has never forgotten me and is always abounding toward me with good things!! IT is He who gets the glory of that house ( and His kingdom that will receive the tithe of the sale!!)

THANK YOU LOVING FATHER FOR SENDING THE RIGHT PEOPLE AND PRAISE YOU FOR THE FAVOR THEY HAVE WITH THE CREDIT COMPANY TO COMPLETE THE TRANSACTION!!!!

Kicking myself!

You know that old saying hind sight is 20/20 well it really is true! So is the trust in God's leading and ways and not mankind.How I wish I could turn back the hands of time and undo some decisions I made in my life but there really is nothing you can do but repent and press forward....'forgetting the things of the past and press in to the prize of high calling" that comes from serving God with all your heart mind body and soul.

Over a year ago when my faith was weak and my body doing some "freaky" things I ran to the doctor seeking answers. I was given medicine that would stop all the troubles while I worked on losing weight but it didn't happen like the doctor said it would. Instead I felt worse and then my body got worse. The sad thing was that I felt at the time He gave me the meds I shouldn't take them but work on the weight issue but FEAR from the "attacks" I was having out weighed my faith and I took the meds thinking I would just go off them when everything got better.

And now here it is over 14 months later and I"m not only better but clearly see my lack of faith over myself and how I have allowed fear to rob me of my faith. With the doctors permission I'm trying to get off the meds but it's proving far harder than I ever imagined--my body is reacting in not so fun ways and I'm having to use every once of faith I have to not let fear of what the withdrawal symptoms are doing to me take over. Some of the withdrawals are worse than anything I had before I ever took the meds!!!! I'm going to be taking it one day at a time and trust in the Lord with all my heart,mind, body and soul.

The good news is that my blood pressure has come down with the twenty pounds I have lost so I don't need this BP med any more...... I just need to get through the beta blocker withdrawals which are brutal at times.

I'm so looking forward to being 'myself' again!!!

Flying the coupe!

The time has come for our youngest daughter to spread her wings and fly. Annie got her own apartment this week and moved. It's been VERY hard on this over protective Mom to let her go even though I have done it three times before. You know the day you hold your precious kids in your arms they are only yours for a while but that "DAY" of letting them go seems so far in the future that you never think about it. I should have been better prepared but I wasn't ,even though she had this place on hold now for a full month I guess I had this tiny bit of hope that she would change her mind and decide to say a little longer.

I have spent the last three days watching her excitement and holding back my tears and trying not to let on what I have been feeling, after all every girl just wants to be excited about their first place and not have her mom rain on her parade. BUT MAN IS IT HARD!!!! I haven't been sleeping, food doesn't taste right and my nerves are on edge!! Then this morning the light bulb goes off and I realize the reason I have been struggling is I haven't turned HER OVER TO GOD--after all she really is his daughter before she is mine. So this morning that is what I"m doing!! Praying crying and giving her back, reaching out to that new phase in her live that means I'm not as needed as I use to be.

I'm going to try and find the blessing in being the ONLY FEMALE in the family. FInd the joy in ONLY having two kids at home--which is so weird it isn't even funny....... Embrace the fact that the only kids I will be cleaning up is the ones that are still little enough to need to be cleaned up after and not big enough to know better.

I went to Annies new place yesterday and she was excited to show it off--it's just a tiny little apartment but she is so proud of it. Colton wants to come spend the night with her and of course her Daddy is thinking that is a good idea--lol!!! We were teasing the boys that she was moving to the moon as I don't expect her to come home for visits anytime soon ( at least not till the money runs out and her food is gone--lol!!), so now her place is nick named "THE MOON" and the boys can be heard saying " I'm going to visit the moon today!". We pray her journey at the moon is filled with joy, peace, prosperity, and great health and for this mom a little tiny bit of longing to come see the HOME BASE every now and then!!

So for my youngest daughter let me say....... MAY THE LIGHT OF YOUR UPBRINGING SHINE BRIGHT AS YOU SET YOUR FEET UNTO THE PATH GOD HAS FOR YOU--MAY YOUR HEART BE FILLED WITH JOY AND HAPPINESS--MAY ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE---AND MAY YOU NEVER FORGET YOUR MOM LOVES YOU AND IS PROUD AND THANKFUL GOD CHOOSE YOU TO BE HER DAUGHTER!!!!!

Being to frugal

Ok I never thought I'd be the one to admit this but there are times in life when you can be to frugal!! Most of the time I'm a firm believer that name brands are NOT better than off brands and I had a really great time putting a certain brother in law in his place once with my "generic frito chill pie"--lol!! He was such a snob at the time and we were a very young, married with kids struggling family. Listening to him go on and on about how he would NEVER buy generic labeled food and that there is a HUGE difference in taste and quality of generics over name brand, and how buying his clothes at the mall guaranteed his were of better quality than those at the discount stores, left me with the need to show him otherwise. So I made a local favorite for our region better known as "Frito chili pie" I used the cheapest of meat, generic season packets, generic corn ships and generic cheese all of which I took out of the bright yellow labeled bags so they couldn't be identified as generic, and had him over for dinner. It had been years since he had had this and he ate 3 bowls full and went on and on about how good it was---all the time I laughed my head off as he polished off the last of it. Then me being me I gleefully informed him he had just eaten generic food and showed him the bags--lol!! It was the best fun I'd had in a while at the time and I will always remember the look on his face as he enjoyed his humble pie--lol!!!!

So the frugal streak in me continues to this day but this time the joke is on me!! I have a dry eye condition along with some other things going on in my eye and the specialist recommended these eye drops that you can only purchase through an eye care professional. I bought one box to the tune of $22 for 30 vials which only last about three weeks if I use them as much as the doctor wants me to and thought they were great and did notice a big difference in the comfort of my eyes. But at $22 a box and needing to use more than one box a month I thought I surely could find something over the counter that was a thick and cushioning as these were. I went to the discount store and found a box of THICK eye drops for severe dry eyes that where only $12 for a box of 30 vials. I was gleeful as I left thinking I was saving a huge amount per month and went home to try them out. This box advertised all the same comforts and benefits of my "doctor recommended eye drops" and even included the caution that they would make your vision blurry when you first place them in our eyes because they are so thick. I figured they would be the exact same as the expensive ones but one drop in and there was a difference!!! The cheap drops are like putting in liquid silicon and the blurriness lasted several minutes not 30-40 seconds like the doctor drops. After about 10 minutes the comfort these drops provided wore off and my eyes HURT and BURNED---it's 15 hours later and they still feel uncomfortable!! It feels like a layer of something was placed on my eyes and then someone SCRAPED it off---ugh!!!

I'm stuck at the house with my two boys and grandson, I'm out of the good eye drops and no way of running to the eye specialist to purchase some more until late afternoon. I have learned my lesson to listen to the doctor and do what he wants and not worry about the money!! Sometimes it's well worth the extra few dollars!! I only hope that I didn't make the eye condition worse by using the cheap stuff. Lesson learned!! I humbly repent for thinking I knew better than the man that spent YEARS becoming a specialist.

But I think we will have cheap chili pie tonight for dinner just to remind me that sometimes fugal is just as good--lol!!

Forever a parent/Daddy the Hero!

When I was little I had this image of me growing up becoming and adult getting married and leading my own live independent of my parents--after all I was going to be the "grown up" Well for the most part that statement is true as I did grow up, became an adult and have lived independently from my parents for one little tiny part. That is the part in which I still need advice whether asked for or not--lol!! and most of all those little things like help with the kids, coming when I'm sick, taking me to the doctor when I couldn't drive myself and things like that.

When John and I became parents for the first time I realized in a very big way that I was NEVER going to stop being this babies mom---that even though my role in his life may change I was always going to be mom. Our role in the life of our four grown up kids have changed, after all they don't need me telling which socks match the outfit they are wearing or need me nagging at them to brush their teeth before bed but they still very much need us.

Last night John's cell phone rang at 2:30 in the morning--it was our son in love calling to say he just got off the phone with our daughter and she was home scared to death. Since he works the midnight shift there was nothing he could do for her, so her Daddy calls to see what the matter is. She doesn't answer which is unnerving to say the least so I call her." A" answers in a hysterical panic to the point that I think she is hyperventilating. I finally get out of her that she heard sirens and then the police telling someone to get out of the car and she thinks they are right in front of her house. now this might not sound so scary to the average person but she has never lived in the city and had to deal with being home alone with the thought of someone getting arrested right outside your window---with all the stories on TV about people running from the law and breaking into peoples homes it has her scared to be alone. She has made huge strides in this during the past year because she had a baby and now had someone at the house with her but just let her think someone could be milling around her house and the tears of fear start falling.

The funny thing is this is not the child that was afraid of the dark growing up nor is this the child that was very clingy as a young child. THIS IS OUR VERY STUBBORN and VERY INDEPENDENT child. The one that NEVER NEEDED HELP,NEVER ACCEPTED HELP and HAD TO DO THINGS FOR HERSELF ALL THE TIME!!! She was the one that made us pull our hair out at the end of the day because of her independence and stubbornness. At the same time she was also our child that had the most compassion for people and would bend over backwards to help someone else in need.

So when I talked to her and could hear the fear in her voice I knew she wasn't going to get over this with just a phone call. Then she asked if we could come get her and I knew she needed us to be "Mommy and Daddy" just one more time. Her dear Daddy who is still recovering from a hernia repair, not moving around all that well and still having a lot of pain laid there for about two minutes trying to see if she would calm down but then jumped out of bed,got dressed and drove to her house to "rescue" her and the baby and bring her back to our home where she could feel safe and secure. It seems "daddies" little girl is always going to be "daddies" little girl no matter how old she gets or how many kids she has for herself. And most of all Mom and Dad's house is always open for when they need that little bit of security that they had when they were a child and being with mom and dad made all things better.


Oh and I think this year for Christmas we are going to give out GERMAN SHEPHERDS--lol!! after all we old people need our sleep--lol!!